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10 Things I've Learned in the last 5.4 decades

I turned 54 today.

And after 54 years cruising around planet Earth, I've learned that 54 isn't really old. I've also learned a lot about myself, other people, what my most favorite color is, how to drive just about any vehicle and which fork to use at fancy dinners.

Some of those things are much more important than others.

But, I thought I'd share 10 things I've learned so far. If I make it another 54 years, check back with me then to see if the list has changed.


1. You will never understand why people do the things they do. It's a mystery that even they probably don't know, and really, are you here to solve someone else's mystery? Heck no, you've got enough on your plate trying to figure out your own self.

2. You are the only one that has control of your true destiny. Yep, there will be people that want to twist your path and turn you around, but in the end, you're the only one that has the compass to your soul. Use it, and let them follow or get out of the way.

3. It's ok to change your mind.

4. You will screw up. More than once actually, and it will be epic, maddening, unbelievable, and breath-taking all wrapped up together and pushed down a hill, catching you as it rolls along, sweeping you up in misery and desperation. The most important thing you can do after this happens is to learn from it. Because when you learn from your screw ups, you can begin again and choose a different path.

5. There are good people in the world and when you find them, you should hang on for dear life, hoping they'll let you stay and hover over their heart, listening and learning, laughing and loving their words, wisdom and ways.

6. You don't have to take every bait offered to you...whether it's a fight, a handout, love, a peace offering or the last cookie, you aren't obligated to take anything from anyone. You don't have to show up to every invitation.

7. There will be dark days and days you aren't sure you'll ever survive, but you will. Getting up and living is your only choice. Be brave, Be bold, Be brazen, but give yourself grace when you need it.

8. Find someone that makes you laugh. That's your soul mate.

9. Family isn't just made up of DNA. Family are those people that make you stronger, calmer, happier and prouder. And just because someone IS family by DNA, doesn't mean they get a free pass into your life.

10. Know your heart. Seek those things that make you happy. Take a nap once in a while. Drink at least one margarita and take at least one shot of tequila before you die.


To say this list isn't complete would be a gigantic understatement. As I look back on 54 years (ok...50. I don't remember much before the age of 4...) I have seen and dealt with so much heartache, happiness, dizzying change and upheaval that I am amazed each day that I wake up am able to breathe.

But I do. And I will. Because I am Unbreakable.

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